Although ultimately we all want more or less the same thing with some variety of spices and condiments, who we want it with and why varies. There is one thing that you need to know right now: Attractiveness is NOT an accident in either gender. If a person values good looks and wants to be attractive to the opposite gender, they’ll thrive to be that. And if they try, they will succeed. If a person values intelligence, they try… Are smart. Only smart people value intelligence, really. Like is attracted to like. The harder it is to be, the more you have to value the trait in order to be it.
This means, if you’re attractive, stop wasting time on… Average. All they want to do is to demotivate you from going to the gym so they don’t have to.
Shallow and entitled? Look who’s talking.
Obviously, attractiveness is more than skin deep, too. Still, NEVER AGAIN listen to women telling you that pretty women are shallow and entitled. It’s likely to be the other way around. A woman who is more than willing to insist on monogamy with a gym bod guy while she’s sitting at home eating chocolate cake sounds nothing but shallow and entitled to me. A fit girl wants you to feel good when you’re looking at her. Otherwise, why bother?
I won’t be speaking on behalf of pretty bimbos.
There’s this stereotype about pretty women being dumb blondes, and of course, I know the type. Still, I’m not interested in their future prospects. I’ll let them live their lives in peace. You, dear sir, on the other hand, YOU, I want to find happiness with someone who doesn’t ignite my rescue instinct.
I won’t be teaching you cheap pick-up tricks.
I absolutely loathe (most) pick-up artists. In addition, I also rarely enjoy relationship advice given by men to men. (Rarely. YouTube’s Charisma on Command is excellent, by the way.) Having said that, I love a charismatic, flirty guy who knows what they’re doing and treats you like a rational, autonomous person. 😀 Pick-up artists rarely do. I’ll tell you a story later.
I’ll help you understand the differences between women and how to get on the same page with the one you like.
Full ten men and women have the same insecurities.
I acknowledge that the idea of a “full ten” is very, very subjective. Still, there are traits that are predictably sought after. I will NOT count money as a sought-after trait by default, but I’ll be talking about money and its importance inside.
What I do count as Full Ten attributes (for both genders):
- Attractive looks: they put an effort into the way they look, or are, at least, capable of doing so when the situation calls for it. (Nobody enjoys dressing up to the nines to go grocery shopping… Well… Unless in LA where it makes sense.) They know appropriate dressing and how to express themselves through fashion. They are fashion literate, especially when in subcultures in which dress is an important communication method.
- Does not demand/assume to be able to date fitter/smarter/more successful/better than self. (Understands there is such a thing as “better and worse” while “good enough” is a personal opinion.)
- Humorous, good-humored attitude.
- Relaxed, laid back attitude.
- Smart to high genius.
- Driven to success – whether achieved or not is irrelevant.
- Curious/interested – actively minded.
- Possesses a level of humility (a rule that I myself am repeatedly breaking on my blogs for educational purposes and I apologize.) A level of humility that allows a person self-assess for a realistic self-image. A full ten errs on the side of caution, however, and rates themselves a 8 rather than 10 if they suspect they’re a 9.
- Open-mindedness even within one’s own chosen world view; ability to change one’s mind with sufficient evidence, proof, or probability shown.
- Sigma -traits. (Not alpha nor beta.) Dominant but not domineering; assertive but not over-bearing. (Capable of handling nuance well.)
- Approachability. (Understandably a very tough call under the circumstances, and gives you but a minus, not a full grade drop even by the worst offence.)
- Unassuming. Although he or she may know there’s a good chance a person of the opposite sex is romantically or sexually interested in them, they don’t jump into that conclusion without proof.
- A full ten cannot be a hypocrite. They will never judge another person for something they, themselves cannot be or deliver.
- Blindness or indifference to one’s own flaws is an absolute no-no, but they cannot be obsessed about little flaws, either.
- A full ten cannot be EVERYONE’s #1 choice because nobody is and that would be awful anyway, but they’re everyone’s more than acceptable second best. (We’re aiming for 1st choice to 1st choice results however.)
- In addition to this, everyone adds their own personal blend of spices, but the above traits are somewhat universal.
If that sounds like a good starting point to you, please stick around.