In 2012, I opened my psychic abilities through instructions online. They worked. Now, I am constantly surrounded by the men I’ve loved since forever. This means that at times, I seem to be jumping the gun and trailing it at the same time.

Through my psychic experiences, I realized something. There is more than one man in this world who has bound themselves to me in ways that are inseparable. I LOVE that. I love these men, and… I may not have found all of them yet. I don’t know if you are one or not, or if you’re just reading a random blog online, but here’s the tea anyway.

I wouldn’t tell you directly even if I knew you’re one of them. Still, whatever my beliefs or feelings, I need you to meet me halfway; I can’t make a claim on you simply because I hear your voice in my head and some people think I’m mighty pretty.

Past Life Brothel Owner

There’s a perfectly good explanation as to why I’m bound to so many men when many women are bound to but one. In my previous lifetimes, I’ve owned more brothels than anything else. I LOVE men, and the only way that I could be around a lot of them simultaneously was to either make love or war – and I’ve done both. I’ve followed my men to battles, and I’ve loved them “for money”.

But I swear, the money has always been an excuse, a front; the real reason, the real motivation, was love.

Now, I want you to myself. I want the wives out, and I want you to myself.

And yes, I know it is… Greedy. It feels greedy and unfair. And I want it.

In my 20s

I remember in my 20s, I was pondering the idea of having more than one actual boyfriend. To become polyamorous. There were more than one man I loved, and I thought how weird it was that I would have to choose between them. Then, I thought, for a second, that I would have to, in order to be fair toward them, allow them to see other women besides me, and I thought, fuck that. I’d never allow it. Therefore, I decided to stick to monogamy, just to be fair.

It turns out, in spirit, you, my men, tell me that you actually prefer that. You see me as a sanctuary, not a jailhouse. And I am flattered.

Already with you

I haven’t met some of you ever. Some of you, in years. Some I talk to on the odd occasion, some, a little more frequently. I know the names of many of you, but there are few spirits that I know by a flash only. I’ve seen one of you rise up as we were having dinner to welcome someone new – and I didn’t know who this person who stood up was, but I knew he was one of us, so certainly there was no question about it.

I’ve seen flashes of a few of you, just one scene that has marked you as existing. The man we named Serif Jesus might recognize himself in that description. The guy who stood up to welcome the new person- we gave a somewhat unflattering name, Welcome Wagon, but he insists I use it. :p Maybe he’s received that information in spirit; I don’t know. One or two of you, I know full well who you are, but we’ve only had short interactions in spirit, as the connection was so obvious from the first moment; it was just like: “OK, see you on the other side then, was nice meeting you again.” 😀

I can’t remember anyone I’m still consciously missing, but what has happened in spirit, before, is that we find someone who we didn’t know we were missing, and then we just felt: “Where have you been, and how is it even possible we’ve survived without you for so long?”

Still, I’m already with you. This means that some of my relationships and fuck buddy scenes are a bit awkward. I’m trying to dodge marriage proposals that I think are looming… 😀 As it’s difficult to say no because “I’m engaged already” to several men I have never spoken to, or haven’t spoken to in years, even decades. Rather awkward. Try to act normal and rational, right?

I don’t know what to do, tho

I don’t know how this works. My logic fights my instinct and habits and intuition, and I’m not always sure which one is which, and even if I did, which one is the accurate guide. So I try and keep my options open. I “date”, and I don’t date. I talk to men I’m not particularly interested in because you are nowhere near me, don’t know I exist, or are there, but hold back somewhat. I am not good at chasing.

Please make it easy for me… If you want to know if you’re one of the men I’m thinking about, ask me. I’ll tell.

And if you wonder how many there is… Let’s just put it this way. Smaller armies have gone to battle and come home victorious.