Club ideals in full

These are not so much rules as they are supposed to be mutually held ideals of the exact target group of this club.

The ideals revolve around authenticity, but authenticity and calm openness do not, in any way, guarantee you’ll be loved (by everybody). We acknowledge and understand that. Take it as an obvious thing. Authenticity guarantees you like being in your own skin (forever). We acknowledge you’re looking for true love (people who love you for the same person you love being and vice versa), and we will NEVER get in the way of you and your True Love and your Real Friends. We might find ways to bring you together with the ones that we feel are meant for you. We will talk sense to you from making BAD CHOICES in relationships (settling on less than what you wish for) on your weak moment, but ultimately the decision is yours.

• Predefined: Personality, values, wants, and needs are inborn. (Rebellious, non-conformist.)
• Main method of choosing friends: “We think alike. We are alike. We love alike. We’re so similar.”
• Our main goal: Be friends without blocking you from your better and perfect lovers, and find them for you.
• Romance we look for: The shit these Lycans and vampires, cheesy romance, and fantasy fiction romance writers are on about. You have to describe it in fiction; otherwise, it just sounds… Unlikely.
• “I have a dream. You don’t need to help me achieve it, but you need NOT TO make it harder for me than what it needs to be.”
• What we’ll (try to) stop: We will no longer spend energy avoiding conflict with people we have to live with. (But avoid all personal contact with them when possible.)
• Learn to walk away from bs when it’s not worth the drama, and engage when it is. Learn to tell the difference.
• Learn to recognize attention-seeking tears & drama and upset when we fucking see it.
• The ultimate dream is to find someone you’ll never get tired of sexually, romantically, and intellectually.
• We form an identity first, and find a group that matches it. (Not finding a group with an open door, then figure out how to fit in.)
• 3 seconds is enough to know if we don’t like you. If we don’t like you, you’ll never get closer than an arm’s length. That doesn’t stop us from talking to you about our emotions.
• Main pain to be solved here: “I’m such a romantic at heart, but all I keep finding is lacklustre connections with nice and ‘deserving’ people. I want fire.”
• Form of narcissism: See above, and “I’m really nice to you at first, and lower your defenses until you reveal to me who you are as a person. If I don’t like it or if I find out you’re too much drama, I drop you like a hot potato. There are simply… Limits.”
• Equality: It doesn’t matter where you were born or in what race or religion, you’ll be judged by the same measure. If you’re good, you’re good. If you’re a cunt you’re a cunt.
• Definition of adulthood: Understanding the concept of personal choice, do as you wish.
• We’re quite spiritual. We tend to feel a connection to everything on a spiritual level. (Some of us hate/feel ashamed of ourselves for it, too, due to Bird Ruled influence, but we should heal that shame.)
• Attention is not a commodity to bargain with. Be nice to everyone, especially people you don’t like or need to stay close to, so interactions will remain pleasant regardless.
• Everyone in a group of friends has equal rights. (Nobody has the right to hurt others simply because or because they “need attention” or something.)
• Your (stupid, childish) hobbies shall be respected and admired by others…
• “Age appropriate” is not really a thing (some of us still play Barbies or model trains, dress like a teen, dye our hair green or… Wear stupid suits from 1940’s and it’s your right, but we may reject you for friendship, sex, or love on the grounds of if we please).
• Friendly competition, no jealousy or envy over success or wealth. (Control your demons.)
• Love happens first, DEEEEEEP commitment follows.
• Love is joy of another person’s way of being them.
• Commitment is “until you no longer love (feel joy over) me.” (We all make mistakes, grow… Life’s a bitch sometimes.)
• True relationships don’t need commitment… But could benefit of expression of a wish to stay together forever. (We’ll learn to take it seriously when a Bird Ruled person asks for a commitment “forever” they actually mean it. Eww. This is not the time to be polite or kind.)
• The Cat ruled are the only group that doesn’t know forgiveness (returning into the relationship) once a line has been crossed. They are capable of co-existing peacefully, while not having a real relationship with you. (Forgive whomever you damned well please, other than that, fuck ’em.) Forgiveness sometimes means “I let go of my anger and resentment” as it is important for us to not be hated, even if we’re not loved.
• Admitting to failure and personal flaws is a sign of maturity and trustworthiness. Noticing them is a sign of an ability to self-assess and take responsibility accordingly.
• If new evidence dictates a better approach, we’ll change our minds, strategy, lifestyle, anything, really. Better is better.
• Life is to be enjoyed, people are to be enjoyed…
• Life is complicated, exceptions normal. The unknown is the unknown. We’re fine with not knowing everything (but we kinda try to).
• Sex… And love… are a reason to keep breathing.
• Friendship: I can see no flaws in you. I want you to admire me, too, for YOUR sake, not mine.
• Society adapts to individuals, not the other way around.
• We don’t care which race you belong to, as long as you are our kind as a person.
• Incompetence is a MAJOR annoyance.
• Adults are responsible for themselves and their own mistakes (we’ll offer help fixing them tho without a second thought, but solving them won’t get you love or a place to stay automatically).
• Consent is the King, unless you consent to no consent. (We handle contradictions and nuance well.)
• Rules should be strict and clear apart from the many exceptions and gray area, nuances, and nit bits only natural Cat Thinkers follow without difficulty.
• We believe in love at first sight (or wish it was real).
• You must be a romantic. (No exceptions.)
• You can’t own people. Duh.
• You can give yourself to a person, sure. (And take yourself away.)
• If someone doesn’t love you it’s your fault, not theirs.
• If love (and desire) is not mutual, it ends.
• You look for people who fit your quirks, not forcefully (or helpfully) try to make available people fit your quirks.
• Conversations & communication are both sexy and romantic.
• Arguing is done with facts, experience, and logic, for the best way to do things, not to establish hierarchy, but the best way forward.
• Do not create unnecessary drama. (Drama must be entertaining and sexy, otherwise, it’s pointless.)
• Your fundamental right is to live the way you want.
• Your standards are allowed to be high; perfectionism is OK.
• Physical disabilities can be made irrelevant, even exciting and admirable by intelligence, unbreakable spirit, and a sense of humor. In this context, nothing fixes dumb or lazy tho.
• Rejection is normal and acceptable.
• You seek deep compatibility, not tolerance.
• Self-knowledge matters.
• Self-expression is your right.
• The attempt to understand others (better) is a natural goal to a romance-driven person.
• You are free to be alone rather than poorly matched, but can form relationships with people who respect your right to move on when you want to.
• True Lovers are allowed to break all generic rules (with each other).
• We’ll acknowledge that when we fall truly in love, we feel it in our brain, and it makes us behave somewhat out of character WITH the person we love. And it freaks us the fuck out, and we have to learn to deal with ourselves and others when we’re or they’re truly in love.

(You don’t have to be certain you understood what each point means, but most of it should sound like the first rain after a year’s drought.)

If you choose to join, you accept:
You may walk away from another person no questions asked.
Others may walk away from you.
Compatibility of character is more important than stability.
Freedom over security.
You will not insist you deserve someone’s love when rejected. (Don’t make them choose between offending/hurting you or accepting a less-than-ideal partner for themselves.)