How to take a sexy selfie the way I like…

Repost (and edit) from way back when.

It’s really difficult to get tips on what to do with photos on a site like this. The quality drops quite fast when people are trying to see what others are doing, and if the first set of photos was poor, so will be the rest of them. Any artists among you? Now it’s time to snap back to who you are, start thinking from your authentic expression, and set an example!

Here’s something that you may not understand as a guy. Girls put A LOT OF THOUGHT into how they photograph themselves. They don’t just appear that way in a photo, every angle, every time. Geesh, you’d lose a hard-on in a split second with some of my selfies, and I’m a good-looking girl.

Professional models take about 300 photos for one published shot, so don’t be shy, it’s digital, you can keep shooting until you can see something presentable. And yes. Photographs lie all the time. I can’t take a decent shot of my super duper sexy fireman stud muffin((Lacking a better expression for someone you’ve got a major crush on but who is still nowhere near your boyfriend and you don’t really know where it’s going…)), who looks exactly like Superman; Clark Kent with his glasses on, and Superman with them off. We’re not close enough for me to suggest a full-blown photo shoot, but damned! What I’m saying that the fact you struggle to find a flattering angle doesn’t mean you’re ugly. Just… Lazy. :p

Yey and ney

Close-ups of penises vs. Close-up of your hands

Although I love a good cock and I do want to see them, there’s a difference between an erotic shot of a cock and a documentative one. 😉 Also, penis close-ups as your primary photo is a worse idea than no photo at all.

So many men take cock shots because they feel it’s the one thing women want to cut the chase to: “What are you packing?” Especially on adult dating sites, men think women get disappointed with the penis, so they get that one out of the way straight away. However, there are plenty of reasons to join an adult site, and chasing detached cocks is really not the main thing about it.

Most of the time, at least, women are not THAT interested in the cock size or shape or whatever. If they do, they’re big cock -obsessed and won’t hide the fact, and come right out and say it. The rest of us value a whole long list of other things before we get to the cock, and then, it’s like unwrapping a present. So, unless you’re hung like a horse, there’s no point sharing.

I don’t want to make it sound like the cock doesn’t matter or that we don’t love it, we do… I personally don’t see the point of having sex without a cock as the main instrument, nor do I want to sound like cocks are ugly or something to be ashamed of, not at all. It’s just that well… Hmm… Maybe you’ll understand this: Imagine a woman whose personality you don’t like. Put her personality into the sexiest looking woman you know. Sexy or not? In the same way, whether a cock is hot or not, it depends on who it belongs to.

Hiding the face

Understandably, many of you don’t want to show your face in your profile. If that’s the case, choose ANY other body part other than your cock for the primary photo.

Men’s hands are very erotic; men’s necks and shoulders are a huge turn-on to many. The obvious answer of the trained abdomen is a sure-fire winner. A bicep works, and if you can get some artistic, beautifully thought-out shot of your forearm, that would probably be a delicious shot even when you’re not trained to perfection – but this requires a bit more artistry as it’s not exactly the easiest body part to photograph. Forearm and hands, your favorite watch or bracelet, should you wear one, there are a few ideas.

If you do something with your hands (like play the guitar, whoa,) you could use a close-up of your hand at work.

The top on, pants off look… Careful with that one.

Although it may work, it is a difficult look to pull off. Exposing those bits works alright, just… with a bit of thinking. It’s a tough look, even for really good-looking and well-trained guys.

Try not to overdo “the sexy” approach…

There are some things that should have died a horrible, painful death by now. All Speedo-style underwear should have gone up in flames already, and every male thong (g-string) variation ever invented. 😀 I know this breaks every Mediterranean male heart, but the truth has got to be said. :p

Also, boxer shorts were still cool in the early 90’s, but those times have passed. (It was also the boxer shorts that kicked the speedo-style out of the mix, so if you’re still in speedos that was the 80’s when the Latin lover boys got their reputation lifted as the ultimate lover, and although I’ll still dine on my knees for some Italian any day of the week, I’ll have to close my eyes when the speedos are flashed. 😀 Also, the white cotton socks are very much from the 80’s, so it’s time… It’s time.)

Some poses…

There’s a collection of poor to terrible poses for men out there already, so I’m just going to suggest a few things…

Girls may be erotic goddesses, but please, as a guy… don’t try to be a girl.

As for “trying to be a girl”… Sometimes, when men want to make an effort to “look sexy”, they think of how women do it. What is sexy for a woman to do is NOT sexy for a man. Some of these poses end up looking so gay that these guys are spending half their time fending off hopeful homosexuals. (Although I am exactly what some men are with lesbians, I’m like that with gay/bi men… Nothing hotter than two men kissing, so I have nothing against gay men, but this guide is for straight men, so… Avoiding looking gay is actually quite relevant.)

The problem we’ve got with straight men, they may not see WHY a man is sexy to a woman. They’re focused on sexy girls, and can’t imagine a man being sexy. But just because you can’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not there.

On that note, I simply say: I have never, nor can I imagine, a man looking sexy naked on all fours when the camera is behind him. Gay men might disagree, but it is a sight no straight woman needs to see… Ever. And to avoid sounding sexist, I also note that there are sights that I tell women never to subject a straight man to, such as the inside of her panties on some days you don’t want to know about. No straight man should be aware of how gross it is to be a girl sometimes. Anyway.

Masculinity is what you are to a woman. Men don’t naturally curve their hips like women do; they might stand on one leg, but they should not be pushing their hip out if they are in their own self. I understand why you do it, but don’t bother. You’re hot the way you are; the female gender is the one who needs to contort to be just hot enough. 😉 LOL. Men should relax for photos and act as naturally as they can. (Easier said than done, yes.)

Try to be as close to you as you can, be you, but naked/partially dressed, yeah?

You know how you like girls genuine, we like you genuine, too. The less you pretend, the better. Just toy with who you are in real life and do the same thing naked for photos. (Oh god, I just pictured my favorite guitarist playing a show naked, and I think I just freaking died a little. 😀 In a good way.) Even if you want to keep your identifiable work stuff out of the picture, go without it, but remember who you are, lover boy… You are the sweetest and the most delicious the way you are… And a little ridiculous trying to be someone else… Whatever you are is different from what someone else is, and that energy is beautiful in itself. Also, the more you get to know who you are, the more you will fall in love with yourself and your sexuality, and the more women will love you.

As a general rule of thumb, don’t photograph yourself in positions that you wouldn’t take while fully dressed and in the company of other men. (Natural polygynists MIGHT be an exception, but I’m not sure.) Imagine yourself fully dressed while taking photos – gives you confidence and stops you from “acting gay”. (And if you feel awkward about taking photos, just pretend like this is perfectly normal. “I am sitting here with my cock out. Fully normal, lol.”)

Practicalities

For a sexy photo, take your underwear off but get back into your favorite pants. Whatever you feel the sexiest in – what you would wear on a date, most likely. Wear that. If you are a t-shirt guy, leave the t out of this one, but if you like buttoned shirts, wear it open. Now… Open the fly and show us what you’ve got there for us if you go for the full heat -photo… If you want to play with suspense, keep the fly open but cover up with your hands… The sexy hands mentioned earlier… Or keep the stuff in the pants but open the fly to suggest a come-hither.

Sit up or lean forward

Naked shots that seem to work quite well are a guy sitting up or leaning forward a little with his cock in his hand, rather than lying back or partially supported. You know the position Every Girl avoids because our tummies would push out like mad and make us look twice as fat as we actually are. The position we avoid getting into when we’re on a date, as we take measures to sit bolt upright… right? Did you notice? No? Good, you weren’t supposed to. So… Guys can use that very position that girls must avoid at all costs, even stockier guys can do that, no probs.

Avoid all positions that make you seem submissive – unless you are a sub. Usually, this means leaning forward rather than leaning backward. Remember, if it feels awkward, it will look awkward.

Technical stuff

Take full body shots or full shots, and then CROP the image. Then share the full shot privately if you left out secrets for a public shot.

The mobile phone camera is meant for photographing landscapes or people in full sunlight, or at least tends to be calibrated for high color contrast or something to compensate for the cheap lens; it picks up every unflattering pump and a curve and highlights it. It creates a shadow where there is none… At least some cameras do. Your mirror image may be completely different from what your camera shows. That is why I like to use a slight filtering for the photos, to bring them back A LITTLE BIT to reflect reality rather than deceive.

Don’t skimp on effort or frames

Take at least 30 shots for every 1 photo you share. The ratio for professional models, by the way, was about 300 shots or more ON FILM for 4 printed photos, so don’t skimp. (One photographer I knew said that he often STRUGGLED to find 4 print-worthy shots in 300 of professional models’ shots, so… If you have to go through a few frames to get a good photo, you’re not alone.)

Use a timer to get away from the camera for the shot, or even get one of those Bluetooth remote buttons that you can get for about 5 bucks at a discount store.

Use the forward-facing camera so you can see what you are doing in case you were not narcissistic enough to notice this option before. 😉 The forward-facing camera often distorts the picture though, which sucks… If you own an actual camera, set it up on a stand and find yourself a big mirror to see yourself from – not to shoot yourself through.

More shots is more, less acting is more.

While you take a ton of shots, adjust the same pose by a fraction. Find something you like and variate a little until you get the perfect shot. You can also use the same idea a million times – I’ve found on FetLife some semi-pro guys use the same idea every day… I’m not sure that’s ideal but hey. You can. You might want to snooping FetLife for angles and ideas, and hey, stick around and friend me.